Stood Up

So, I got stood up on Saturday. I know, not exactly breaking news on a Wednesday.
Anyway, so I was supposed to go on a third date with this guy. We spoke Friday morning, and I said, "are we still on for Saturday?" He said, "absolutely." I never heard from him again until the night before last when he called after I had gone to sleep. What the hell?

See, this is where I really think that brutal honesty would be great. I think in break ups and job interviews lying to protect the feelings of others is just silly. How can we change or improve if we don't know what to change or improve? I think in relationships or the "ceasing to see each other" events, honesty would be great. Here are some examples of useful honesty.

• I'm sorry, I don't want to continue to date you. You are a little larger than I am comfortable with.
• While I am quite interested in having sex with you, I also want to have it with numerous other people without you expressing your dislike.
• While I was a willing participant in the first date sex, it makes me think you are way to slutty to actually be a respectable girlfriend.
• You seem really smart. I don't like smart.
• You seem dumb. I can't have a ditzy girlfriend.
• You know how you asked me to do things weeks, sometimes months, ahead of time? Yeah, that freaks me out. I think you are like obsessed or something.
• My friends hate you.

See, that is useful information. I can work with that information. Some might say that it seems overly harsh. Well, I am probably going to be peeved at the guy that doesn't want to continue to date me anyway, why not let me be angry for the RIGHT reason?

It can work in job interviews too.

• You are really overqualified for this job. I think you are going to bail the minute something better comes along.
• You don't dress very well, and clients won't like that.
• You seem dumb.
• I think you are a big lying liar. No way were you the over a training department.
• You misspelled things in your resume. I think you are probably really careless.
• You have gotten fired more times than I am comfortable with.
• You didn't wear a watch. I don't think you are normally punctual.

Once again, all useful information. I just think that in some situations, the feelings of others don't really need to be protected. I really do want to know why he chose to just stand me up. What made him decide that I wasn't even worth a phone call to say he didn't want to go out? Ah, the mysteries of life.