How's it going?

How's it going?

Not well if you must know.

Yesterday, I spilled some red creamy sauce on my new white shirt. Three washings later, it is not completely gone. Curses!

Access to the laundry room is becoming more and more difficult. They really need to expand the room ASAP, or I am going to just have to stop using it. It really isn't worth me paying the fee the complex charges (I know, crazy) when I can't even use it at my convenience.

The stupid owner of the motorcycle took one of the prime parking spots. I'm sorry, but that Ninja can park ANYWHERE. It doesn't need to take up an ENTIRE parking space in our too small parking lot. Must find new apartment.

On my drive to work, I hit a bump causing me to spill my full RockStar on the floor of my car. Fun. Sticky fun. Not only are my floor mats covered in the day glow yellow liquid, but my shoes also fell victim to the spill. Despite wiping them off, they still feel sticky. Grrrr.....

Gotta say, this week? Not going so well.

At least they are making an X4. That makes it a little better.

X-Men

First, I really enjoyed X3. I was worried that I might not, that the new characters and the absent characters would be too hard to overcome. But Beast rocked. Kelsey, who knew you had it in you? Angel was hot. My only complaint about the new characters would be that there just wasn't enough screen time for them.

As I left the theater, I was filled with sadness. Not only because of the fates of some of my favorite characters, but because this might have been the end. Surely not, I said. This movie grossed 44 million in the first DAY. 20th Century Fox is not going to let this cash cow go.

Then today, I saw this and my world was happy again.

Fox Confirms X-Men 4

Despite the stupid title "X-Men: The Last Stand", Fox Head Tom Rothman has all but confirmed that there will indeed be an X-Men 4, and probably more after that as well. Now it's all well and good for him to say that now... but if X-Men 3 is a bomb (which we all know it won't be... even if it sucks) then those words will be quickly eaten.So why the title "The Last Stand" then? Well, according to the good folks over at Movie Hole, Rothman offers the following explanation:“It's the conclusion of this trilogy.

These three movies work as a trilogy. These characters in this relationship, it's the culmination of that saga. It's the culmination and the resolution of those relationships laid out in the first two movies. That doesn't mean never, I would ever say never again, but I will say that this brings that saga to an end. It's quite the way the last Lord of the Rings, Return of the King, brought that trilogy to a conclusion in terms of those characters, that's what this movie does. It goes all the way back to the first one and rounds off and completes that three-part story."

Perhaps someone should tell Rothman that the end of the Lord of the Rings was indeed actually the end of the whole series. He might have missed that part. So all this talk of "this is the end of THIS saga". This particular story line in X-Men is indeed finished... but there are more to come.

Oh JOY! I can't wait to see how they write themselves out of this hole. Perhaps it was all a dream that Jean Grey had while in a catatonic state? That would be very Dallas of them.

DVD Release Dates

DVDs that cannot release soon enough...

Veronica Mars: Season 2 - August 22
















Lost: Season 2 - September 22















Queer as Folk: Season 5 - May 30
















Supernatural: Season 1 - September 5












No cover art released yet. It was difficult finding a pic of the two brothers without Jensen Ackles being covered in blood or mud.

No word on when Alias will release.

Center Stage

I love this movie.


If it is on, I will watch it. I really wished I owned it so that I could watch it whenever I wanted. I just can't get enough of it.

The red costume. So scandalous!



Peter Gallagher and his magnificent eyebrows that I long to wrap around myself.

Nightmare

So, I had a nightmare last night.

In my dream, Special T and YayCoffee showed up to my apartment unannounced. The door to my guest room was open.

And they saw.

They saw the room.

The room I have not only NOT cleaned since I moved in, but that I never took the time to unpack. The room that I keep throwning things into rather than actually put them in their proper place. There are about a bagillion things I would rather do than clean that room. That room makes even me uncomfortable, which is why the door is ALWAYS closed.

They saw the room. And they stopped being my friends.

Mama Brit

The delicate fabric of reality might fold. I am about to defend Britney Spears. I know. Usually, I am the first to mock her. But "they" are attacking her parenting skills. Aside from the no car seat thing, most of her mess ups have been typical first time parent things. I think people should give her a break. Trips and falls and accidents happen. It is part of life. I mean, I feel into a space heater when I was four, but CPS didn't descend on my parents.

Convo with Josh

This is from a while back, but I am sure everyone will find it as amusing as me and Josh do.

Josh and I used provide tech support for this company in Austin. The company's product was truly a piece of crap. It had the unique distinction of being both released too early and being behind on technology. But the iOpener is not the point of this story.

Josh and I share many passions: photography, Nestle's Quik Vanilla (never look at the nutritional information), cute boys, analyzing the inane, setting of overly sensitive car alarms. But the interest that truly cemented our friendship was the love of Hershey's Almond bars. We would wax poetically for hours about the bar. Below is a conversation we had about the Hershey's bar.

MAV: Let's go get a Hershey's bar.
Josh: Yes! Let's go.
MAV: Okay.
MAV and Josh: *purchase bars and sit at table*
Josh: I love the Hershey bar, but it doesn't have enough almonds. It needs more.
MAV: Yeah, but they only put one almond per letter.
Josh: *turns his bar over and counts* You're right! I can't believe you know that!
MAV: *shrugs and giggles*

Several days later we take another Hershey's break.

Josh: Look at this! My bar only has 7 almonds.
MAV: Really? Quality control has really gone down at the Hershey's factory. You should alert them.
Josh: I will.

He composes this email (paraphrased)

Dear Hershey's,

I purchase a Hershey's Almond bar today. It only had seven almonds. I am aware of your one almond per letter standard and wanted to alert you to the fact that my second H was without an almond. I wanted to bring this to your attention.

Sincerely,
Josh

---

Here is the response we received.

Dear Josh,

We are sad to learn that you received a substandard Hershey's Almond bar. If you will send in the bar, we will replace it with a bar containing the correct number of almonds.

Thank you,
Hershey's Corp.

---
Sadly, the bar had already been eaten, but I do keep my eye out for an inaccurately almonded bar.

Bargian

I just discovered a fabulous site. It has unbelievable prices on mobile phone, MP3 player, laptop and PDA accessories. I mean, seriously great prices. I just bought two car chargers and a new set of retractable iPod ear buds for $25. How awesome is that? I got a $32 charger for $7. Amazing!

Here are some other awesome deals...

Dell laptop battery: $63.90 - regularly $122.90
Bluetooth set - $39.90 - regularly $139.90
USB cord for iPod - $11.90 - regularly $35.99
Lithium phone battery - $12.90 - regularly $52.90

If you need new accessories, check this site out.

Target Employee Song

I was introduced to the Target Employee Motivational Song. It is probably one of the funniest things I have seen on the internet like all day. And I saw some pictures of Oompa Loompa Simpson's oddly sagging boobs.

The Summer of Bloody Marys and Big Glasses

Orange is the New Nude

I thought I would be able to let this pass without mocking, but I was wrong. Jessica presenting at the ALMA Awards.

Adam Rodriguez Inner Thoughts: Do not look at her. Must not giggle. Do not look at her. Must not giggle.

Jessica Simpson Inner Thoughts: Nick is totally gonna be jealous. The partiratzi are going to say I am dating both these guys.

Jay Hernandez Inner Thoughts: She's orange. No really. She is actually orange from head to toe. Also, I don't think she is really a Latina.

Adam: Do not look at her. Must not giggle. Oh no. About to lose it. I will stab myself with my keys. The pain will prevent the giggles. Ow! No, she is still hilarious.

Jessica: Where is Alma? I was told I would get to meet her. Oh my gah! Is that Nick talking to Eva Laboria? How did he get in here? He isn't a person of color!

Jay: No. Definitely not Latin. We are a brown people. She is orange. Adam: Oh no, I think I nicked an artery.

Adam: Must.Not.Laugh. How is it taking her this long to read one line?

Jessica: Gah! My boobs hurt. Why did Ashleeeeeee not have to get implanted? And her new nose doesn't look that great. Mine is much better.

Jay: Does anyone else smell creamsicles?

Party Weekend

Parties make people crazy. It is true. We do things we wouldn't normally do. We say things we wouldn't normally say. People make out. People break down. It is alcohol fueled insanity. This weekend's party was no different.

I made the trek to Nacagdoches for my friend Chris' Annual 29th Birthday Party. When he showed the container I would be using for the punch, I knew we were in for an interesting night. It was a huge Rubbermaid container. You could have fit at least one body in there, several if they were quite small and bendy. We bought much liquor just for the punch. I had the grand idea of soaking the fruit in the rum all afternoon prior to making the punch. This was a brilliant idea as the punch did not burn going down despite the presence of several bottles of Everclear. And most of us never got drunk. Just really, really happy. And no hangover the next day. That is the way to do it.

Here are the highlights of the party:

• Jennifer asking two lesbians exactly how they had sex. Did they use tools or was it more of a tactile approach? She never got an answer.



• My announcement that I had inappropriate lust of Supernanny. She has this naughty librarian thing going on that I really like.



• George's many costume changes including his barely there Indian costume (complete with wig and lack of undies) and his Speedo though he never got into the pool that I saw.



• Lindsay the Whiner's party breakdown. I thought we might be spared the breakdown this year, but I was wrong. Apparently she REALLY likes being the designated driver and gets really upset if anyone else drive. Absolute hysterics that she did not drive John and Kim home instead of Tiffany. She proceed to sit at our table and scream out that she needed Chris - he was the only one who would understand.



• Me coming very close to punching Lindsay the Whiner after a highly catty comment to me. I abstained (mostly cause I have never punched anyone and this girl was rather large and would have probably beat my ass if she could see through the tears) and instead opted to go watch the George show (who knew what he would be wearing now)



• George's stripping money being stolen. This was just sad.



• Chris' delight over my gift of the first season of Knots Landing. Though we did have to admit that the first seasons of those shows were never as good since the main villainness did not usually arrive until second season. See Woodward, Amanda; Carrington, Alexis; Sumner, Abby.

Quiz

Yeah, I am jumping on the quiz bandwagon. See how well you know me...

http://www.quizyourfriends.com/linkquiz03.php?quizname=060503150012-135716&

Tentative Birthday Plans

Just in case you were wondering what I want to do for my birthday...

Books

YayCoffee wrote a post about how she got rid of a whole bunch of books over the weekend. I would like to do the same, but I can't. I don't want to. I like my books.

Sure, they take up a lot of space that limits the addition of new books.

Sure, I rarely re-read them.

I know all of this, but I can't part with them. They are like old friends. They are badges of honor. In fact, I dream of an entire room dedicated to books (some call it a library, I hear). I want floor to ceiling, built-in bookshelves. I want to fill them with my books, my accomplishments. And that is what they are: accomplishments. See that book? I read that. Look at all these books. I read them all. Of course, there are a great deal of chick lit books in my collection, so the display will probably be less impressive. But the sheer quantity will make visitors release tiny gasps of awe.

But, I don't have this dream room (library). I only have my apartment and its limited shelf space. I have things where I like them, so I can't just shove books onto the already occupied shelves. It would mess with the aestetic. So, I dream of bookshelves for my spare room. It is the only solution. I tried to join book swapping/sharing sites and could only bring myself to list about 3 books. And even with those 3 books I thought I could live without, I felt a tug at my heart as I dropped them in the mail to go off to their new owners. My tiny, paperback friends were leaving me. I had to quit the sites after that.

Weird lip

Yesterday was a little odd in many ways. First, I massively overslept despite the addition of a really loud alarm clock across the room which I must get OUT of bed and walk to in order to silence it. I still snoozed for 2 hours. Is there no solution? Must I pull a Special T and actually put the alarm clock IN the bathroom to get me out of bed and into the shower in a timely manner?

Second, I drank my first Rockstar ever. It was pretty good, but I think that my insides might now actually glow yellow. I imagine people watching me through thermal binoculars or whatever, and my spot would glow bright yellow leading me to be incorrectly classified as an alien.

Third, I guilted YayCoffee into letting me come over and watch Veronica Mars and House (DVR is not completely superior to the VCR). I also made her let me watch Gilmore Girls. Do you know what she did while I watched Gilmore Girls? She cooked dinner for us. How nice is that? I am a sucky friend as I never prepare dinner for my guests. I sometimes order us Chinese food since I have them on speed dial, but I rarely cook.

Finally, YayCoffee convinced me to Nair my upper lip. Now it feels weird. It doesn't tingle or anything. It just feels not right. It seems slightly rubbery and like some sort of goop is still on it. I have washed the lip several times and am certain it is goop free. But I still have phantom goop feelings. The lip might feel weird, but at least it is hairless. Now I can go and have my eyebrows waxed without the waxing lady making me feel like a Yetti. Really, asking me once if I would like my lip waxed is enough. Six times is just rude.